Matt Bors
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Archive for November, 2009

Career Opportunities

Generational Warfare ain’t what it used to be.

Illustration Friday–on Sunday!

All sorts of fun noises were coming from a bathroom stall.

Someone hands some fans a pair of free Angels tickets.

Late Update

Here’s last Wednesday’s comic. Can a prolonged recession curb our impulse to buy gifts for people that they don’t like, want or need? We shall see.

Holiday In Cambodia

If you are reading this then I haven’t found an internet connection on my annual Thanksgiving retreat to the Oregon coast. More likely, I’m enjoying these few days off so thoroughly I haven’t bothered to look for one. See my latest cartoon over at comics.com and have a great holiday.

MC Bors

I thought I’d spit a verse for the Side Hug Rap. I’m sorry. I love this.

Check it. Yo. Yo.

From “Let There Be Light” ’til JC come back/ touching groins while huggin’ is straight whack/ A sin, in fact.

Sexual repression is the lesson/ hugs got my body stressin’/ don’t need no frontal pressin’/ only that lateral affection.

I rep virgin pride, dun/ I hug from the side some/ The same place the Romans stabbed Christ when he died, son.

The Side Hug Code

Disciples have been straight up side hugging the shit out of each other since the Last Supper.

Disciples was like, “Yo, Jesus. Why the fuck are we all on one side of the table? I mean, why not spread out like normal folks and use that other side?”

And Jesus was all like, “So we can side hug, fucka.”

The Side Hug: Putting all other hugs on notice.

Side Hugs Rule Everything Around Me

It’s noon where I’m sitting. This should have 5 million views by 6, be auto-tuned by 7, and brutally parodied by tomorrow morning.

The Cult

Frightening.

Catholic Consistency

NYTimes:

Representative Patrick J. Kennedy of Rhode Island said on Sunday that the Roman Catholic bishop of Providence had instructed him to refrain from receiving communion because of his stance on abortion.

In light of the churchs clear teaching, and your consistent actions, the letter said, I believe it is inappropriate for you to be receiving holy communion and I now ask respectfully that you refrain from doing so.

Another letter was sent to everyone who has ever attended his church. In light of the churchs clear teachings on war, materialism, lying, supporting war and helping the sick and poor,” it read, “it is inappropriate for a single person to show up for communion ever again.”

“Please return when you are as Christly as me,” the bishop wrote.

Predator Stork

The “Pro-Life” movement should be more consistent.

See a related cartoon here.

Wednesday: Holiday In Cambodia

9/11 trials, again

I’m compelled to post again about the 9/11 trials. I’ve been having trouble wrapping my head around the objections. Evidence, charges, trial, punishment. Seems like an ingenious process to me.

Charles Krauthmmer complains:

September 11, 2001 had to speak for itself. A decade later, the deed will be given voice. KSM has gratuitously been presented with the greatest propaganda platform imaginable — a civilian trial in the media capital of the world — from which to proclaim the glory of jihad and the criminality of infidel America.

We faced Hitler and Hirohito but can’t handle a rant from a jihadist! I might rewrite that paragraph this way: September 11, 2001 had to speak for itself. A decade later, the victims will finally see justice. The United States has gratuitously presented itself with the greatest propaganda platform imaginable — a civilian trial in the media capital of the world — from which to proclaim the glory of the US Justice System and the criminality of terrorists.

Though he does have a point here:

Moreover, everyone knows that whatever the outcome of the trial, KSM will never walk free. He will spend the rest of his natural life in U.S. custody. Which makes the proceedings a farcical show trial from the very beginning.

Exactly. Trying someone who seems clearly guilty but was tortured in detainment for years presents some issues. Maybe we shouldn’t do that anymore.

Illustration Friday

A driver hits a biker, then berates him.

And an idiot gets T-boned making a U-turn–while ogling a girl on the sidewalk.